Tag: #notastraightline

Dealing with change…

by thrutheashesblog, posted in #Changes, #Growth, ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Goals, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, TheOnlyEasyDayWasyesterday, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

I'm struggling today. Photo by Alexas Fotos on Pexels.com The fatigue is really bad today, and I'm just feeling stressed with life in general. It doesn't help that my plans for today ended up going sideways; I had intended to do some work in the office today, working on researching my next assignment for my … Continue reading Dealing with change…

Self-care

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, DBT Skills, END THE STIGMA, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, grief, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, loss, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, small victories, Stress, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Today was a somewhat busy day. Being Friday, it was my day to cover the store. it wasn't overly busy, but it was steady. It did provide plenty of opportunity to get my next assignment edited and submitted. Five down, three to go. After I finished at the store, Lynn met me for supper, and … Continue reading Self-care

Course correction

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, Creativity, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Fatigue, Fitness, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

I officially need to back off things a bit. I'm feeling pretty good mentally, but I am getting tired. Physically, my blood pressure and blood sugar levels are stating to hate me as well. I've had som much going on that I haven't b been working out, and my diet has gone to crap, resulting … Continue reading Course correction

Productivity…

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, Creativity, DBT Skills, Depression, Dogs, END THE STIGMA, Entertainment, Faith, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Gaming, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Highlight reel, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, Photography, PS4, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Road Trip!, Self-care, Self-confidence, Self-harm, sheep dogs, small victories, Uncategorized, Uncharted, Writing Therapy

Today was a somewhat productive day. I started the day by letting myself sleep in a bit, then when I got mobile I started catching up on some office work that I had been neglecting for too long. Then I was out the door, doing another photoshoot with a previous client. After the photoshoot I … Continue reading Productivity…

Keeping busy, but finding downtime too.

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Entertainment, Fuck Mental Illness, Gaming, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Injured List, journalism, just for fun, keystone habits, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, Physical injury, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Road Trip!, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, small victories, suicide survivor, The Outer Worlds, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Today was steady. I didn't have a lot on the books schedule-wise, but after last night's council meeting I did spend a good chunk of my day researching and writing. However, that was broken up by a visit from my editor in Stettler. He's been on the job as the editor for the Stettler paper … Continue reading Keeping busy, but finding downtime too.

Admission update: Figuring out how to feel.

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Abandonment, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, Colour spectrum, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, grief, Habits, History, Hope, Hospital Admission, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Relapse, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Well, after a week, I finally had the opportunity to see Dr. M again. He had been keeping tabs on me through staff, but hadn't seen the need to actually meet with me every day, which I suppose is a good thing. He confirmed this morning that my discharge is set for Friday. I'm not … Continue reading Admission update: Figuring out how to feel.

A task completed

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Entertainment, Faith, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Gaming, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, Red Dead Redemption 2, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, small victories, Storms, Stress, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Today had a little bit of everything thrown in. Knowing that I had a meeting tonight, I turned my alarms off and slept until 0900, then played some Red Dead Redemption 2 for a bit before walking Taffy, followed by some time in the office, working on some graphic design and photo work. For lunch, … Continue reading A task completed

Discomfort

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, Black and white thinking, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Creativity, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Fitness, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, journalism, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, Self-harm, sheep dogs, Storms, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

The last couple of days have been busy. Between school, house-chores and writing for the paper I haven't had a bunch of downtime. I don't know why, but I found yesterday particularly hard. I had anxiety move into my chest yesterday morning, and it didn't budge all day. It led me to feel tired and … Continue reading Discomfort

knocking down trolls

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Family, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Scars, Self-care, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Blood doesn't make someone family. I broke my rule of not checking social media before bed last night, and saw that a family member left a troll-like comment on one of my previous posts where I was struggling mentally. It hurt that a family member could be so callous, telling me to "get a life" … Continue reading knocking down trolls

Going down swinging

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Family, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, reporter, Self-care, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

I've been better, I've been worse. I just wish I could shake this fatigue and low energy that is following me around like a big black dog. I'm dragging ass. I'm tired. I'm emotional. Yet, even as hard as life feels right now, I'm still standing. I may not be gaining ground, but I'm not … Continue reading Going down swinging