Category: Suicidal Mind

Tomorrow is a new day…lessons learned

by thrutheashesblog, posted in #Changes, #Growth, ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, growth, Habits, journalism, learning new skills, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, Photography, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, small victories, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, TheOnlyEasyDayWasyesterday, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

This morning, I hit the ground running, and didn't stop. I was up and out early to cover today's county meeting, then home to get them wrote up. B picked me up after lunch, and took me into an appointment in Stettler for an eye appointment. The appointment went well, though the doctor does want … Continue reading Tomorrow is a new day…lessons learned

downtime and gratitude

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Fallout 4, Fallout4, Family, Fuck Mental Illness, Gaming, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Hope, Hospital Admission, journalism, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

My first full day home was productive, if not overly busy. I ended up spending a couple hours on my studies, completing and submitting my second assignment for school as well as starting on the next unit. I also got some laundry done and changed the bedding in our room. Yesterday wasn't all work and … Continue reading downtime and gratitude

Admission update: Figuring out how to feel.

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Abandonment, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, Colour spectrum, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, grief, Habits, History, Hope, Hospital Admission, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Relapse, Self-care, Self-confidence, sheep dogs, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Well, after a week, I finally had the opportunity to see Dr. M again. He had been keeping tabs on me through staff, but hadn't seen the need to actually meet with me every day, which I suppose is a good thing. He confirmed this morning that my discharge is set for Friday. I'm not … Continue reading Admission update: Figuring out how to feel.

CW: Rollercoaster…

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Anxiety, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, DBT Skills, Depression, Dogs, END THE STIGMA, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Furry Family, Habits, Hope, Impulse control, journalism, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, Physical injury, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Self-harm, sheep dogs, small victories, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Edit: today continued to decline and the suicidal thoughts hit me in a wave so hard I had to stop driving as I broke down completely. Definitely not a good day, but my doctor is fitting me in today. I have way too much going on to be this damn tired. While yesterday was an … Continue reading CW: Rollercoaster…

Uptick

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Family, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Hope, journalism, keystone habits, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, Photography, ptsd, Pushing myself, Relapse, reporter, Self-care, Self-harm, sheep dogs, small victories, Storms, Stress, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Despite not sleeping very well last night, this morning I have woken up feeling more of a spark than I've had in the last few days. I've been able to get up and get motivated, already finishing up some work, and being able to sketch out some semblance of a plan for the day. The … Continue reading Uptick

CW: Mental health relapse/update

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, Anxiety, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Impulse control, journalism, keystone habits, Making time for what's important, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, Relapse, reporter, Self-care, Self-harm, Storms, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

I know I've been absent over the last few days, and that my most recent post was locked. I'll be honest, with the fatigue I've been feeling extending into it's second week, I have not been at my best mentally. I've been struggling with impulsivity, self-harm urges, and ever darkening thoughts. I'm hoping that the … Continue reading CW: Mental health relapse/update

Reminders

by thrutheashesblog, posted in ;, Acceptance, Accountability, adaptability, Anxiety, Balancing Mental Illness, Belly of the beast, borderline personality disorder, bpd, contemplation, Contentment, DBT Skills, Depression, END THE STIGMA, Faith, Fatigue, Fuck Mental Illness, Goal Setting, Goals, Habits, Injured List, journalism, keystone habits, learning new skills, Mental health, Mental Health awareness, Mental Health recovery, Mental Health Tools, Mental Illness Awareness, Motivation, my story isn't over yet., Perspective, ptsd, Pushing myself, reporter, Self-care, Storms, Suicidal Mind, suicide survivor, Uncategorized, Writing Therapy

Today did not go as expected. I ended up covering the store today as Lynn wasn't feeling well, which put a crimp in me getting anything else done. On the bright side, the store was busy enough that I wasn't bored, but slow enough that I managed to finish an article for the paper, do … Continue reading Reminders