Annoyed…

I’m a little annoyed at myself right now.

I took yesterday as a recovery day from my workout regime, however with how today worked out I didn’t manage to get a workout in today either.

Still, today wasn’t a complete loss. I did get a couple loads of laundry done, as well as a bunch of writing. I know it’s easy to get down on myself for what I didn’t do, but I need to focus on what I have.

It’s been hard though. The last few days I’ve been struggling. My motivation has been lagging, and I’ve carried an overall aura of fatigue which has been making it a challenge to get done what I need to. I know it’s affected my schooling, which is why I think I’ve been struggling so much with this next essay I have to write. The frustrating part is I know I can write a solid piece. I just wish it didn’t feel like such a struggle to do it.

One thing I need to keep in mind is that despite the fact I’ve been lagging and struggling with motivation, I’ve been continuing to put one foot in front of the other instead of totally shutting down, which for me is a significant improvement. With the exception of the last couple days, I’ve been on the treadmill working every day. I’ve been writing my creative writing piece every day. I’ve been taking notes and doing research for stories for the paper. It’s been a slog, but I’ve been working through it.

And that, my friends, is the biggest indicator yet of how far I have truly come in my mental health journey. I’ve been through hell. I’ve come a long way over the past few years, and that fact that I have remained as productive as I have is a testament that.

So, I’m going to let myself be annoyed with myself tonight, and tomorrow I’m going to jump back into things.

Kevin

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