Regaining my equilibrium

Today was definitely a challenge, but I made it through.

The hardest part of the day was running the audio/video board at the church today for a friend’s funeral. On top of everything else over the last couple of days, it was tough.

With where my mind is it would be way too easy to get down on myself, and let myself fall into depression. My workout and diet have kind of jumped ship over the last couple of days, and I’m definitely feeling it.

The thing is, I know I need to cut myself a bit of a break. It has been a rough couple of days.

The thing is if I look at the pluses, I know I am doing ok.

I did manage to get my self onto the treadmill, and did just over 1.3 miles. My heart rate stayed lower at the higher paces, so I really haven’t missed too big of a step. I did manage to get a story written for work, and some photo’s submitted as well. I also started preliminary work on a couple of stories that I have been putting off for way too long. Despite feeling like crap, it was a productive day.

I even managed to find some time to play some Red Dead 2. I’m in the final stretch before I finish it, and I am loving the story.

Do I feel like crap?

Yeah, without a doubt.

Am I back sliding?

Nah, I don’t think so. There are too many markers telling me otherwise.

I know I will fight my way through this murk. I have been here before. I likely will be again. It’s part of my illness. It’s something I deal with.

And in all honesty, I feel like I’m bouncing back a bit after my workout on the treadmill tonight. With the last few days I’ve had, it’s easy to get knocked off balance. It’s hard to maintain your equilibrium and fight back through it, but I think I am doing it.

Thanks for following along,

K

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