I’ve been struggling today.
My mind is in turmoil, and my inner voice is lost in the commotion. As much as I have been enjoying everything I’m doing, I’m feeling it.
I’m feeling it, and am having a moment where I am feeling the sting of defeat and frustration.
I want to work. I want to be able to support my wife and I. I want to live a normal life.
“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try, sometimes, you might find you get what you need,” are particularly poignant song lyrics, courtesy of the Band from TV, for me today.
I can’t always get what I want. Finances and health don’t allow it. Neither does time or practicality.
I do usually manage to get what I need though. Financially, WCB and CPP disability meet my needs, so I am not forced to work full-time to make ends meet. This allows me in turn to take a step back when I need, and focus on mine and Lynn’s health.
I know I’ve been pushing it hard lately. Harder than I can tolerate for the long term without things in my brain starting to break.
I do have some stories I need to work on, but they can wait for a bit. Right now it’s time to recoil and reset, stopping the slide before it gets out of control. One of the joys of freelance writing is I can take time when I need.
I’ll get what I need to done today, and do the rest after I REST. Tomorrow is a new day.
Thanks for tagging along,